Broken
by LittlePinkDevil
Summary: She was corrupted a long time ago, her innocence long gone. What was left, was a ghostly remembrance of what she used to be. She was broken. Sasuke x Sakura
1. Embracing the pain

_Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto_

**Broken**

_By: __LittlePinkDevil_

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_**Chapter 1 – Embracing the pain**_

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_My smile was empty_

_It was fake and forced_

_I look at you__…_

_And I feel pain_

She sat there cuddled in the corner of her room, her head bowed down as her pink tresses covered her eyes. She was like a shadow. _Dark, invisible and ignored._ She had sat there for countless hours now. She couldn't tell since time for her had frozen. She refused to move. Refused to _live._ She had lost hope. The hope she once treasured and kept. The hope to live a normal life. The hope to live and be free. But that was all in the past now, she was never that cheerful girl anymore. That part of her died. _Gone and forever forgotten._

She trembled slightly as her pale skin felt the cool breeze entering the room from her open window. Her small hands rose to hug her petite body and brought her knees closer to her chest. Raising her head, she stared at the darkness that greeted her green orbs. Her room was always dark. She liked it that way. Darkness for her, was a friend. A companion yet so empty and so cold. But, she was never fazed at this. Because, she herself was also like that. Her heart had been frozen a long time ago along with her soul. And she was left like an empty shell.

She lowered her head and stared confusedly at her trembling hands. She was at the moment, confused. Her brows slightly furrowed and she clenched her fists. She felt _nothing_. No pain, no joy, no sadness. _Nothing. _She closed her eyes and searched her mind for any possible answers. But, nothing came up. Gently, she bit on her lip and heaved a soft sigh.

Slowly, she stood up and her legs led her towards her bed. She sat down and her fingers lightly touched the soft silk sheets. She eyed the light pink color as her fingers continued it's assault. She wanted so much to sleep. It had been so long and she had already forgotten how it felt. But she _can't._ Insomnia plagued her and nightmares would leave her crying in the middle of the night.

Still sitting in the bed, she turned her body the other way, a mirror now in front of her. Dead eyes stared back and her face was now different than it was years ago. Her pink lips were dry and chapped and her hair was messy and uncombed. But, she never cared. She didn't need to. She was useless now. _So, what's the point?_

Gently, she lied down her bed and stared at the ceiling. Momentarily, she closed her eyes and allowed her consciousness to drift, thinking particularly of her past. She had missed a lot of things. Things she may never have the chance to do again. Her lips formed a small sad smile and she choked back a sob. How, she wanted to just return to the past and start again. To live a new life. But, that will never happen. The past is the past and you can't changed it.

She realized she had changed drastically. Never did she smile. Never did she laugh. Never did she cry. _The past is past and I won't repeat the same mistakes again_, she thought bitterly. Slowly, she lifted her right hand and placed it atop her forehead. Biting roughly on her lower lip, she let out a frustrated growl.

_I hate myself_, her mind chanted over and over again. She hated what she had become. She was a monster, a devil. So merciless and cruel. Her insides churned as memories flew past her head. Abruptly, she sat up, growling menacingly at the darkness before her. She clenched her fist and punched the bed countless times.

_One__…_

_Two…_

_Three…_

_Four…_

_Five…_

Her clenched fist stopped in midair, her chest heaving up and down as her lungs sought to replenish some oxygen in her system. Slowly, she lowered her hand and let her body lie in the softness of her bed. She stared blankly at the ceiling, momentarily closing her eyes as drowsiness overpowered her, a lone tear escaping her eye.

_A monster__…_

_hated_

_unwanted_

_unloved…_

Her body shifted and turned as nightmares came to disturb her. Her mouth opened slightly, letting out a soft moan. Her body shivered furiously, her figure compressing similarly into a ball. She continued to thrash, turn and shift. Moments later, her eyes opened and she sat up.

_I feel__ pain…_

Clutching tightly on the thin fabric of clothing near her chest area, she felt the furious beating of her heart. Slowing closing her eyes, she tried to calm herself.

She slowly lifted up a shaking hand and lightly touched her right cheek. Her mouth emitted a small gasp as she stared and analyzed her fingers. They were covered with a certain watery substance. Tears.

_I'm crying…_

She bowed her head slightly and brought her knees close to her chest, hugging them tightly. Tears were now descending fast as if each tear drop were racing towards a finish line. Her shoulders were shaking uncontrollably as she sat there sobbing and crying.

For years, she never cried when nightmares would wake her up in the middle of the night. It was a routine. A habit. She would wake up and stare endlessly into the darkness before strutting into the bathroom to take a cold shower. It was always like that.

_Until now…_

She loosened her hug on her knees as her sobs died down into soft sniffles. Lifting her head, her eyes remained closed for a few seconds before opening to reveal red swollen orbs. She stared blankly into the darkness. She shuddered involuntarily as she remembered the nightmare. It seemed real. As if, it had happened again and that she was there to witness it.

She turned her head slightly to the left, as a thought crossed her mind. Her hand reached out to lift the object that was lying down her bedside table, making it stand. Her eyes stared at the picture as memories once again flashed through her mind. She missed them all. Their company. The missions. The memories they all shared.

Her eyes travelled to stare at her perverted sensei then at Naruto and then at _him. _

_Sasuke…_

The person she wanted so much to forget. A person who caused so much grief and suffering into her life.

Tears threatened once again to fall but she stopped herself. She never wanted to cry again. Because if she did, then it would make it _twice_ in one night. And she would never allow that.

Heaving a sigh, she lied back down the bed and closed her eyes. She couldn't sleep. The prospect of having a nightmare again still lingers at the back of her mind. She shifted to the left and found herself staring once again at the picture.

No longer able to control herself, tears once again fell from her green orbs. Her body shivered furiously as she laid on her bed.

_She was broken. _

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_A/N:__ This is my first fic in Naruto…hope you all liked it! Please also give comments coz I'd appreciate that…thanks! _

_**LittlePinkDevil**_


	2. Reminiscing the past

_Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. _

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_A/N: __I'm sorry I updated soooo late! I know that making an excuse that I'm busy with school work is too damn common and normal for most but I'd still go with it anyway coz it's the truth…My sincerest apologies to all you for making you wait! Thank you also for all those who reviewed! I really appreciate all your comments… I realized also that many of you had mistaken this fic as a one-shot… it's not actually… if you looked at the previous entry, I had already labelled that it was the first chapter… so I wonder why most of you thought it was a one-shot… There will be a couple of flashbacks in this chapter, so I trust that you won't confuse the present from the past since flashbacks are written in italics. _

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_In flashbacks:_

"_talking" _

'_thoughts'_

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_Thanks to:_

_liandrin_

_Hyuuga's Winged Guardian_

_starfireyumiabi_

_SasuSakuFan_

_HeartAngel_

_tazii_

_fieryice.t_

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_Thank you so much for reviewing!__ Anyway, on with the story!_

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_**Chapter 2**__** - Reminiscing the past**_

_During the day, I smile_

_And at night, I cry…_

_I hated the pain,_

_I hated myself._

For a long time, Sakura had sat beside her window, staring endlessly on to the orange-streaked horizon. She looked helpless and pitiful. _Empty and soulless. _Her green orbs refused to neither blink nor move, as she sought out her jumbled thoughts. She was confused and unsure of what emotion she should be feeling at the moment. Her mind tried miserably to think, plan and reminisce anything that might help her situation but as always it is was all a blur.

Heaving a soft sigh, she continued to watch as the sun slowly descended from the sky. _It was so ethereal…so beautiful and so peaceful, _her mind had mused. She had always admired whenever the sun would set. It deeply reminded her of the life she had long _wanted._ The life wherein she would be at _peace._ The life wherein people _admire _her for what she is and for what she does. The life where people _understand _you, _care_ for you…_love _you. But she was far from the glistening orange sunset before her very eyes— the sunset that everybody _adored _and_ loved_ watching.

--

_Sakura__ walked slowly on the streets of Konoha, her footsteps making the slightest noise. Her hands clutched her right side loosely as she limped and balanced her tired body to prevent herself from collapsing. _

'_Just a bit more…I'm almost there'_

_The hairs on her neck stood and she shivered involuntarily. She could feel them. She could feel their eyes following her every move__, scrutinizing her whole being. Her dull jade eyes remained void of emotion as her gaze lingered only on the rough concrete floor. Her naturally sharp ears picked up several hushed voices as she continued to limp her way home._

"_What a pity…"_

"_How dare she shows her face here!"_

"_Does she have no shame?!"_

--

Her dull jaded eyes stared as the sun disappeared, darkness gradually overflowing the surroundings. She blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted to the dark glow of the night. _Darkness is once again at my side_, her mind sarcastically sneered. It had always been there for her. _Good and bad…_It had always been present to witness her _sorrows_ and _anguished cries_…Her _loss_…Her _pain_, _suffering _and endless _misery…_ it was her _only _companion.

Slowly, she shifted her eyes once again to look at the sky. Her mind went blank as her eyes longingly stared at the twinkling dots that were now appearing. A small smile tugged her lips as she was entranced by the stars' beauty.

Her eyes skimmed for constellations as she slowly lifted up her hand to trace up patterns with the stars. _Indus…Sculptor…Aquila… _hermind chanted as her hand continued on tracing the constellations. If only she was a star, then everything would have been easy. Sparkling brightly amongst the darkness, you'd be constantly _admired_ and _adored_ by everybody. You would not feel pain or sorrow since you don't possess any emotions just the light and sparkle you provide through the night. But she _wasn't_ a star, she was _human. _A human capable of hurt, pain, joy and anger— perfectly imperfect.

Moments later, cold wind flew past her and her body trembled slightly. She rose and casually walked towards her closet. Opening the lower right drawer, she pulled out a white soft blanket and returned towards her usual place beside the window, draping the soft cloth gently around her shivering body.

Contented that her body is now warm, she shifted her eyes once again at the dark sky, staring longingly at the stars that glistened luminously in the midst of the darkness. _Beautiful… _her mind whispered. Night had always brought her a sense of peacefulness. It was simple source of comfort beneath her grief and solitude. Hearing the soft sounds of insects in the background and the gentle calm whistle of the wind often soothes her discomfort and fear through the night. But, not all nights relieves her from her distress and _worst_ fears.

--

_H__er eyes widened slightly and Sakura stopped in her tracks. For a few seconds, she stood there unmoving and stared. She was confused and unsure of what to do. Moments later, a soft sob reached her ears and she crouched down to meet the little girl's face. Hesitantly, she offered a hand, her lips twitching slightly upward to ease the situation._

"_Are you alright?" Sakura__ asked, her voice soft and gentle._

_The little girl looked up, her eyes widened as her sobs increased into strangled cries. __She was shivering slightly and had inched away from Sakura's outstretched hand. Her little hands slowly moved to cover her tear-strained face as she continued to weep._

_Sakura was perplexed and moved slightly towards the little girl, offering her hand once again. _

"_Sshh… Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you." She gently coaxed, her hand now moving to touch the girl's shoulder. __But, before she could touch the girl, she felt someone slap her hand away. _

"_Get away from her__, you monster!", a tall woman shouted at her, scooping the little girl in her arms as she glared fiercely at Sakura. _

_Sakura stepped back slightly, her eyes nar__rowing into slits as she stared hard at the woman. _

'_Must be her mother…' _

_Sakura opened her mouth slightly__ to defend herself but no sound came out. Talking back would somehow worsen the situation. Moments later, the all-familiar creepy feeling of being watched troubled her insides. Glancing around her surroundings, she realized people had stopped to stare at her, a few glaring intensely. Her eyes continued to skim her surroundings as she felt a few familiar charka signals amongst the crowd. _

_Her jade eyes stopped to meet cerulean orbs that were shadowed of worry. Her brows furrowed slightly as his eyes continued to stare at her. Her eyes then shifted to the person next to him, her lips forming a straight line as she gazed at the recognizable mask he was wearing._

'_They saw everything…and all they did was stare at me…'_

_Her lower lip__ quivered as she gave them one last glance before turning her back. Ignoring all the eyes that stared at her, she walked away. _

'_Alone…'_

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Sakura stood up and went to her bed, lying her back down as her eyes stared at her ceiling. Briefly, she closed her eyes for a moment. As always, her body wouldn't succumb to any means of tiredness or exhaustion. Even if she was at least getting some sleep, the hours she slept could never pay off the total number of hours that her body needed. Insomnia had always plagued her, if not then nightmares troubled her to an extent where she ends up sitting in her bed staring at nothing and waiting for the sun to rise.

She shifted her body to her right, adjusting her position for some comfort. _Well,_ _no surprise I can't sleep_…she thought miserably. She opened her eyes and shifted herself on her back only to stare at darkness. She had never bothered to switch on the light. A person like her had always been linked to darkness. _Why indulge in light, your opposite when you can relish in darkness? _

Realizing that there was no use in forcing herself to sleep, Sakura opted to take a long relaxing bath just to pass the time. She rose and walked casually towards the door on her right. Opening the door, she switched on the light to reveal cream walls, and white tiles— a medium sized bathroom made only for her.

Walking towards the bathtub, she opened the faucet as water flowed to fill the tank. She then stripped herself of any clothes, dumping them properly inside the laundry basket. Waiting for a few minutes till the tub was filled with water, her hand gently touched the water's surface. Contented with the temperature, she effortlessly dipped her whole body, her head being the only thing exposed.

Her hand moved to grab the bar of soap beside her, gently lathering her body with it. Her hands lightly fingered the scars on her body, a small reminder of all the things she had gone through— both significant and crucial _moments_ of her life.

She flinched slightly as her fingers gently caressed the small unhealed cuts on her arms and legs. She had no time to heal them, knowing all too well that another wound would appear. Her body, once a piece of _admiration_ and _beaut_y was now, hideous and marred with _flaws_.

_The cruelty of life…_her inner self spat bitterly. Life had never always been fair. She learned it the _hard_ way. It was forever etched in her mind— difficult to forget.

--

_The sun was burning brightly__, a sign of a very hot day. The villagers continued to work hard while the children played happily on the streets. People were doing their usual daily chores. Everything was the same and quite normal. _

_Sakura staggered slightly, __as she walked towards the gates of Konoha__— her ANBU cloak torn and her cat mask on her hand. __The guards briefly nodded, eyeing warily the bloody corpse she was carrying on her back. Indifferent to whatever the guards thought of her display, she proceeded on her way heading mainly to the Hokage tower._

_Her back ached of carrying the body as she shifted her position for better comfort. She reeked of blood__— both hers and the corpse's. __Her body was full of gashes, tolerating the pain she feels._

_People stopped their work and stared hard at her while the children cowered in fear at the scene. They recognized those pink tresses anywhere. Their eyes followed her every move until she disappeared from their sight._

_Relief flooded their insides as their mouth let out air they weren't even aware they were holding in. Hesitantly, they continued on to their work, their eyes still scanning the perimeters as if expecting Sakura to appear again._

"_Was that her?"_

"_Yeah…"_

"_You mean…?!"_

"…_Pink hair, green eyes… inhumane, brutal and aggressive…"_

"…"

"_We all call her…"_

--

Sakura gently rose from the tub and flushed all the water. Slowly, she went to grab a towel that was located on her right and draped it tenderly on her naked body. She then walked out of the bathroom. Her ears picked up the howling of the wind and the patter of rain. _I must have enjoyed my bath too much to not notice it was raining outside, _her mind realized.

Ignoring the loud whistling of the wind, she proceeded towards her closet, rummaging for clothes to wear. Momentarily, she glanced on her clock beside her bed and it read 3:50. _Good, time for training…_ she thought. She hastily pulled out her training attire and got dressed. She gathered her weapons and scanned the room for anything she might have forgotten. Motivated to train hard, she exited her room hastily, stepping into the _cold_ and _fierce_ trickle of rain.

--

"…_the cherry blossom of death__"_

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_A/N: End of chapter two! After months of absence, I finally updated this fic! Whew! Anyway, don't forget to give reviews, people! I really want to know what you think of the story…Hope you all like it…_

_**LittlePinkDevil**_


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